Long-time kossack aitchdee has been struggling for a while, asking for small amounts of help now and then. At last, I'm sorry to report, her problems have come to a head, and she really needs any kind of support this community can give -- not just monetary support, but advice and emotional support as well.
She's asked me to describe her situation as simply as I can, which I'll do below the fold. aitchdee lives in California, in the general area of Sacramento, so if you have knowledge of services and/or laws in California, you are most particularly welcome to make suggestions.
I am sure I don't have to ask most of you, but will say for the record, please be kind in your comments here. Her troubles are what they are, and the question here is, what is her road forward, not what should she have done differently before this. If you don't feel that people should turn to this community for help, it's quite easy to close this diary right now.
Thanks so much! Here's the story. It's long, so get some tea...
aitchdee moved to the Sacramento area in 2004, with her mom. They sold their family home in the Bay area and bought a condo with the cash. aitchdee had long worked for Barnes & Noble, and she dreamed of owning a bookstore of her own. Her plan was, move to a place with fewer existing bookstores, work in a small independent store for a while, to learn more about non-mega-bookstore operations, and then open a store. She'd noticed her mom's cognitive powers declining as well, so a situation where she could bring her mom to work seemed ideal.
She ran the local branch of a small store for a year, but then her mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, having declined so much that she could no longer be left alone, and aitchdee had to leave her job and care for her mom full-time. Through a state program called In Home Health Services, she was able to be paid a very small wage to be her mother's full-time caregiver.
Meanwhile, trouble had developed with the condo. The previous owner had installed skylights that proved to be leaky. In order to buy the condo, aitchdee had to sign an agreement to hold the condo association harmless for any further leakage of the supposedly-repaired skylights. They were not repaired, however, and have never been. The first winter, she paid $900 in money she'd saved for property taxes to "fix" the skylights, and that was the beginning of a giant sinkhole of inadequate repairs and deferred tax payments, one she could never afford to climb out of once she began her full-time care for her mom.
aitchdee's mom passed away in late 2010, and so, in addition to the obvious loss, she also lost her state-paid job as caregiver. She had 14 months of unemployment benefits, and then survived on odd jobs and occasional gifts until she was hired by California Caregivers, doing the work she'd done with her own mom and putting in 70-hour weeks. That job continued until this summer. She had been experiencing strange pains in her hands and feet, and by June was so disabled that she went to the ER and was eventually diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. She was forced to leave her job, and has lived since then on a small state temporary disability stipend. She has applied for federal SSDI benefits but has not yet been approved, and as we know, that may require several re-applications and take a very long time.
At this point, her temporary state benefit has run out, so she has no more income at all. She had supposed that, when she came to that, she could sell her condo, move to an inexpensive rental place, and live for a while on the proceeds of the sale. She has a considerable back-tax liability on the condo, and in fact, if nothing else happens, it will be seized and auctioned by the county on February 20. Nonetheless, she and her realtor had thought it could be sold for more than the liability before then and give her some money to live on. But! the leaky skylights. There's so much water damage (the full extent can't really be known without opening up the ceiling, which she can't afford to do) that it's going to be difficult for her to realize enough on the sale to live on for long, after the taxes and penalties are paid.
She is currently exploring bankruptcy. There's some indication that the tax sale could be deferred longer if she declared bankruptcy, but she is not sure that, as a person with no income and no reliable prospect of any, she would be eligible for the form needed to help her get some time. She'll need a lawyer who's conversant with bankruptcy and real estate issues -- do you know of anyone like that in her area? If a retainer is required up front, she doesn't have it, so put that at the top of the list of what she needs to pay for.
Her realtor, who's been helpful and thinks the condo could possibly be "flipped" by speculators he knows, has recommended that the place be professionally cleaned. She is too disabled to do anything like it herself. She has one estimate of $220 for this. Do you know anyone who offers services like that, especially if they might be willing to give her a price break?
And meanwhile, she goes on incurring living expenses. She owes over $400 in electric bills, and will be shut off in a couple of days if she doesn't come up with at least $185. She'll owe about another $200 in current and overdue utilities this week. She'll need gas to get around, at about $32 per tank at present, and she'll need to eat.
She's looking for another place to live. She's considered women's shelters, but unless you're an abuse victim or have kids, there's nothing available locally. She'd love to be able to keep her best friend, her dog Frances, but if she can't find housing that accepts dogs, a friend will take Frances in. Do you know of anyone around Sacramento who might have a room for a quiet middle-aged lady and possibly her dog? Do you have any other housing ideas? She's obviously limited in what she can pay.
And, what else do you know about being broke and disabled in California that might help her? To whom would you refer her for any of the things she's in need of?
Rather than make this any longer with even more detail, I'll close by saying that aitchdee will be in the thread to answer questions, or you can kosmail her to discuss your ideas. If you're able to help her in any way, THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH! Her issues are far too big for any one of us to handle, and that's why we need support of the community, collectively brainstorming and also checking under its sofa cushions to keep her afloat for a bit.
If you can spare any money without harming yourself, her first choice is PayPal because that gets her the funds quickly. If she's to keep her electricity on, she'll need $185 coming through PayPal in the next day or so. Many thanks to JekyllnHyde for these instructions:
If you've never used PayPal to send money to anyone, it is really simple.
- Go to PayPal.com. You do not have to have an account to send money.
- Click Send Money to Family and Friends.
- Enter aitchdee's email address (which is twilithour@mac.com) and amount you are sending. The sender's name is visible to the recipient.
For those of us who can't deal with PayPal, she's set up a GoFundMe page. They are slower to release funds to her, so please use this only if you cannot use PayPal.
GOFUNDME
And if you'd prefer, she's updated her Amazon wishlist with non-perishable foods and household items she needs. If you buy from the wishlist, they can ship to her directly. If you'd like to send essentials not through Amazon, please kosmail aitchdee for her shipping address, and let her know what you're sending so she can take it off her wishlist manually.
AMAZON WISHLIST
If you'd like to send money and cannot deal with any means of doing so other than sending a paper check by USPS, please kosmail aitchdee for her information. We list this choice last because she no longer has a bank account, so cashing the check costs her a fee of 10% of the check value. Nonetheless, it's more money than she'd have had otherwise, so if you need to use this method, of course she is very happy to have your help. [Update: you might consider buying and mailing an inexpensive postal money order rather than a check. aitchdee could cash these at any post office without a fee. Thanks to Most Awesome Nana for this idea!]
As always, recs, tips, republishes, FB shares, and tweets also help bring more eyes to the diary and thus more potential help. Many, many thanks.
7:20 PM PT: Latest tally is $284 through PayPal, $200 at GoFundMe, and several items from Amazon. Many thanks to everyone! The (quickly released) PayPal funds mean the electric bill can be paid down enough to prevent shutoff this week!
7:46 PM PT: PayPal $459, GoFundMe $300!
Wed Jan 07, 2015 at 9:58 AM PT: Wednesday: This community is wonderful. aitchdee will be back to thank everyone eventually; she can type for only so long before her hands swell up and become too painful. She's received some generous gifts, of money and goods, and the information people have added here has, I think, potential to help her situation enormously. She thanks you all VERY much, and I do too. She's gone to the doctor and will be back in the thread later today. xoxoxo!