You remember a couple weeks ago how that Evergreen cargo ship was blocking the Suez canal? And how they finally got it unstuck on March 29? And how they told us that they did it with giant tug boats?
Yep, they said it right to our faces, as if we were all born yesterday. Giant tug boats! The fact is, the canal authorities didn’t want to disclose what really unstuck the ship, because it was even more bizarre than giant tug boats.
Let me fill you in. It all started when Andy and Peng realized that a blocked Suez Canal meant possible cat food shortages, so they decided to go and see what they could do to remedy the situation.
Of course, being unfamiliar with the territory, they got lost on their way to the canal and finally — dusty, hot and hungry — turned off the road at what they hoped was a diner.
Just then Peng sustained a slight injury…
They hop in the car and hit the road.
Meanwhile, back at the tomb…
Struck by the novelty of the horseless chariot, the mummy has finally grown somewhat composed.
UNTIL…
Wouldn’t you know it, just then the car hit a pothole, and Andy reflexively squeezed.
Well, the hugging-it-out continued for a couple hours until they finally reached the canal, with Andy blacking out a few times along the way, though it had no noticeable effect on his driving.
The mummy expended the rest of its pique by wrenching the cargo ship from the embankment and brandishing it threateningly.
Afterward, they headed for Cairo, where they serendipitously got stuck in a traffic jam that turned out to be the Parade of Pharoahs. Tootin’ Kitteh was thus conveyed with appropriate pomp to his new home in the National Museum of Egyptian Civilization.
All’s well that ends well, I guess, although Peng might have a different take on the matter.
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And for Andy fans: The Big Book of Andy — Now With More Aliens
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