I'm prepped. I'm packed. I'm set, and I've been ready for years.
When I came back to California four years ago, I really thought I'd only be here for at most two years. That stretched on and on, due to scrambling to make the rent every month, trying to pass the classes, and general inertia.
So, I'm really ready to leave. Tomorrow. 7AM.
(Final Check out on the Flip)
This is not a goodbye, just an acknowledgement that I may not be able to update on the road. Would love it if the camera on my phone worked, but for some reason uploading to the web service promised me by AT&T is problematic. Ah well, stuff happens.
Been really just planning and prepping. Did my laundry last night, packed up the car this morning. Been avoiding things that will keep me here.
Did my final walk around the local mall, the local shopping district. Am right now in my final trip to the library. And for some reason I don't really feel anything at all.
This place has really no pull for me. Monterey is just a town that feels like it doesn't want me here. From the prices, to the dress codes, to the tourists, it feels like somewhere that I don't belong. And I'm ok with that.
Can't say for certain it'll be better elsewhere, but at the same time, the inertia of staying here will just ensure I do the same thing every day. I've tried too many times to make changes as I've lived in this area, and the attitude of those who make the decisions hasn't changed in four years.
I'm ready. Ready to go and happy.
Here's looking forward to 2-4 days on the road. Only 746 miles to my destination, and I'm good with that. Looking forward to the uncertainty, to be honest. Makes me feel alive.
Going to be here for another 2 hours but I'm really stoked about this.
And I can't express how much writing about this, talking about this and just being here has helped me. I'm letting go of the anger that I felt the first few days, and I'm ready to live again.
Here's hoping... Just hoping.
2:53 PM PT: See you when I get the internet back.