Remember "Angry Soda Tax Lady"?
You know, the woman who ranted "Those pennies add up!" as she pulled a single, two liter bottle of soda out of her car?
She's baaaaaaack.
This time she's toned it down a bit. She talks more, with less anger, but more cynicism.
Because we all know things go better with Coke, and that includes wingnuts.
We all remember that first ad. She drives up and rants on and on about that extra...what, five cents? she'll have to pay for that single bottle of soda she picked up at the store. She talks to us with a considerable amount of anger and snippiness, as if we're all Amway sales agents who woke her up in the middle of a nap. Then she and her two depressed-looking kids walk into their home and slam the front door in our face. One door she didn't close: the rear hatch on her Ford Focus. Maybe she was meant to be absent-minded as a way to garner sympathy and take the edge off the chronic anger.
So I get this earful from this woman who's supposed to be my neighbor, and suddenly I'm wanting to stay as far away from her house as possible and hoping to God I don't run into her at the market or something, lest she start up on me again.
So in the latest ad...we all run into her in the market.
Her son really, really wants a DVD of some fictional movie with "Mission" in the title. ("Mission Accomplished"? No, they wouldn't do anything like that, would they?) But Mom says no and her son sadly says, "I know, we're on a budget."
As she pushes her cart in our direction, the now-less-angry-but-more-verbose soda tax lady goes into her spiel, this time maybe shaming us more than browbeating us, into opposing the tax on sodas and juice drinks.
Several things I've noticed:
I guess it's more obvious this time, but she's clearly not wearing a wedding ring. Really, soda guys? You're sticking up for single parent households by opposing health care reform and taxes that control non-healthy items? And you expect us to buy this, too?
But perhaps the most cynical thing about this ad is where it takes place--not just the supermarket but the aisle. No, it isn't the soda aisle. No, it isn't the fruit juice aisle (often a totally different part of the story). No, it's not the snack aisle that is so close to the sodas in almost every store, from Wal-Mart to the smallest mom and pop.
It's the fruit and vegetable aisle.
Yes, that's right, the fruit and vegetable aisle. You normally see someone speaking to you in this aisle for two reasons: they're promoting a healthy lifestyle or promoting the supermarket itself. But not here. The upspoken subtext here is that the tax man is interfering with her ability to give her family a healthy diet.
I mean, really.
Personally I think it tells us a lot more about her--and the people who put out this ad--that when Angry Soda Tax Lady talks to us, she turns her back on all the melons, etc.
O.K. soda guys look: we get it. You stand to suffer if people start cutting back on sodas for health, tax, etc. That's why you keep making these ads portraying soda and sugar-rich fruit drinks as staples, not as something that could be jettisoned in the wake of a recession or a fear of kids growing up to be diabetic. If any of your ads ever address the idea of just doing without sodas, you know you'll be starting an argument you'll lose. I mean, you'll get pummeled.
Well that's too bad.
You obviously feel threatened by the health care bills and want to garner sympathy for people who struggle to make ends meet. Problem is, none of you assholes know what that's even like so you're having trouble relating to the rest of us. That's why you have this poor woman looking like that extra nickel is going to destroy her as if she's never been more serious in her life.
But as I found out during my own teen years in the recession of 1980-82, you can do without sodas with surprising ease. Yet as even your own ad demonstrates, there's still a whole lot of people--a whole lot--who will still suck 'em down and funnel 'em down their kids throats. And that represents a lot of money for the health care they'll need later in their lives.
I do believe there's some poetic justice (Divine Will, karma, whatever you want to call it) that will help us out on this. I saw a great example of this on CNN this morning: the same commercial break that aired this new ad, also showed an ad for a water purifier that had people slurping nice, clear tap water left and right.
I'm not going to tell these guys how to do their job, which is to oppose an idea I think is pretty good. But I will tell say, they might want to consider something that doesn't insult everyone's intelligence so much. Because right now, the most coherent argument coming out of these ads, is that the idea of taxing sodas and junk food is a surprisingly tough argument to knock down.
Edit: OK I finally saw it again...the movie is "Mission: Control." I was mistaken, she is wearing a ring. And the final shot does show mom and son walking their buggy along an aisle that has both juices and soft drinks. Funny how that ad aired all morning then disappeared the rest of the day.