The most important rule, the rule you can never forget - no matter how much he cries, or how much he begs, never, never feed him after midnight.
Right now, there's probably about a kajillion kilowatt hours making lights blink on various homes and businesses around the country. Some of my best memories are connected to the holidays. I remember this time of year holding so much "magic" as a child. As we grow older and the commercialism becomes more apparent, some of that magic falls away. But there's still nothing like waking up on Christmas morning to find Optimus Prime and Voltron waiting under the tree. Of course, those were the days when toys were made of die-cast aluminum instead of crappy plastic ... but I digress. While I remember the presents, it's the "little things" that mother and father did to try to make things special that stick with me.
I've done variations of this topic in the past, but since it's Christmas Day I thought I would lay a question on the table for discussion. What are the best (and worst) holiday based movies, TV shows, etc.? To me, the best forms of holiday entertainment are the ones that either capture the "charm" of this time of year, or the absurdities that surround it.
Follow beneath the fold for more ....
So let's get the ball rolling with an annual staple of Christmas-time viewing.
► It's A Wonderful Life - (1946) - "A toast to my big brother George, the richest man in town."
I'm gonna start with the granddaddy of them all. This is arguably the definitive Christmas film, as well as one of the defining works of director Frank Capra's career. Does the film's ending come together just a little too easy? Well... yeah. But by God does it work, and it's probably one of the best endings in movie history. Almost every part of it (e.g., Jimmy Stewart running down the street in happiness, the toast, the bell ringing, etc.) is iconic.
It's also interesting that, while the ending is a happy ending, Mr. Potter gets away with the theft, which is even more remarkable considering it arguably violates the
Hays Code Hollywood was operating under at the time.
From Filmsite:
It's A Wonderful Life (1946), originally made for Liberty Films, is one of the most popular and heartwarming films ever made by director Frank Capra. Frank Capra regarded this film as his own personal favorite - it was also James Stewart's favorite of all his feature films.
It was actually a box-office flop at the time of its release, and only became the Christmas movie classic in the 1970s due to repeated television showings at Christmas-time when its copyright protection slipped and it fell into the public domain in 1974 and TV stations could air it for free... It is actually a dark, bittersweet post-war tale of a savings-and-loan manager who struggles against a greedy banker and his own self-doubting nature in a small town. Earnest do-gooder George Bailey (James Stewart) recognizes his life as wonderful and truly rich, even in its humdrum and bleak nature, only after suffering many hardships, mishaps and fateful trials (including compromised dreams of youth to leave the town and seek fame and fortune, other sacrifices, dismay, losses and the threat of financial ruin, and suicide). He is given encouragement by a whimsical, endearing, trainee-angel named Clarence (Henry Travers).
The story turns Dickensian (similar to A Christmas Carol, although told from Bob Cratchit's point-of-view rather than from Scrooge's) when the hysterical, despairing, and melancholy family man is shown what the small town (Bedford Falls, now renamed Pottersville after the town's evil tycoon) would be like without him. It's a frightening, nightmarish, noirish view of the world (at Christmas-time) that brings him back from self-destruction. He returns to the idyllic, small-town world that he left, with renewed faith and confidence in life itself. Hence, the film's title: It's a Wonderful Life.
► Die Hard - (1988) - "Yippee-Ki-Yay, Motherfucker!"
This is absolutely a Christmas movie. The events occur during Christmas-time, with Hans taking over Nakatomi Plaza during the Christmas party. One of the signature moments of the movie is a dead terrorist with a Santa cap being found and having "Now I have a machine gun, Ho Ho Ho" written across his sweatshirt.
I always go a bit of time in-between seeing the original
Die Hard, and then I'll catch it on TV and I'm always surprised by how well it stands the test of time. This movie is one of the first big action blockbusters, and inspired a legion of bad copycats.
One thing that has always made it stand above all of those copycats is the quality of the villain; Alan Rickman's Hans Gruber. That character is not an idiot, and neither are his henchmen. They're just outwitted by John McClane (Bruce Willis). Director Jon McTiernan purportedly based the tone of the film on William Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream. All of the events happen during one crazy festival night (i.e., Christmas), and causes changes in the relationships between the characters.
► The Apartment - (1960) - "Why do people have to love people anyway?"
Many consider Billy Wilder's dramedy one of the best films ever made.
There is a melancholy gulf over the holidays between those who have someplace to go, and those who do not. “The Apartment” is so affecting partly because of that buried reason: It takes place on the shortest days of the year, when dusk falls swiftly and the streets are cold, when after the office party some people go home to their families and others go home to apartments where they haven't even bothered to put up a tree. On Christmas Eve, more than any other night of the year, the lonely person feels robbed of something that was there in childhood and isn't there anymore.
When Billy Wilder made “The Apartment” in 1960, “the organization man” was still a current term. One of the opening shots in the movie shows Baxter as one of a vast horde of wage slaves, working in a room where the desks line up in parallel rows almost to the vanishing point. This shot is quoted from King Vidor's silent film “The Crowd” (1928), which is also about a faceless employee in a heartless corporation. Cubicles would have come as revolutionary progress in this world ... The screenplay, executed as a precise balance between farce and sadness, has been constructed by Wilder and I.A.L. Diamond to demonstrate that while Baxter and Miss Kubelik may indeed like each other--may feel genuine feelings of the sort that lead to true love--they are both slaves to the company's value system. He wants to be the boss' assistant, she wants to be the boss' wife, and both of them are so blinded by the concept of “boss” that they can't see Mr. Sheldrake for an untrustworthy rat.
► Love Actually - (2003) - "I love that word 'relationship.' Covers all manner of sins, doesn't it?"
I like this movie, but I know people who despise it, and think it's the worst thing that Richard Curtis has ever done. For those unfamiliar, Love Actually is a romantic comedy that interconnects ten different stories set during the holiday season. While there are definitely big romantic moments in the movie, not everyone gets a happily ever after, in fact some of the relationships are left in ambiguous and damaged places.
"General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaking suspicion... love actually is all around." -The Prime Minister
However, some critics have pointed out some of the more eye rolling moments. For example, three of the relationships are based around older men romancing younger women that work for them, which under some circumstances would be a sexual harassment lawsuit waiting to happen. And one of the big gestures of the film usually gets one of two reactions from most women I've talked to about it. Either it's the most romantic thing a guy could ever do, or it's one of the creepiest things a guy could do to a woman who just got married.
► Semi-Homemade Cooking with Sandra Lee - (2009) - Kwanzaa Cake and Hanukkah Cake
What about the worst holiday programming ever? How about the infamous Kwanzaa Cake perpetrated by the Food Network's Sandra Lee? The Food Network has had some great shows where cooks actually cook food. And personally, I was a big fan of the original Iron Chef. Where else could you watch someone bludgeon a live octopus with a rolling pin?
However, Semi Homemade is a horrible "cooking" show, where Governor Andrew Cuomo's girlfriend, Sandra Lee, purports to show people how to cook by slapping some stuff together they bought at the supermarket and calling it a day.
"The most terrifying thing I've seen is her making a Kwanzaa cake. Watch that clip and tell me your eyeballs don't burst into flames. It's a war crime on television. You'll scream."
-Anthony Bourdain
Of course, if you didn't like the Kwanzaa Cake, there's also Hanukkah Cake, which she made with non-kosher marshmallows and the worst Star of David in television history.
► Lethal Weapon and Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang - (1987 and 2005) - "I'm too old for this shit."
Shane Black really loves Christmas. So much so that it always appears in almost every movie that he's involved with, from Last Action Hero to Iron Man 3. Both Lethal Weapon and Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang were written by Black, with the former being one of the best examples of a 1980s buddy cop action franchise and the latter critically acclaimed for being a perfect blend of twisty detective thriller and comedy, courtesy of Robert Downey Jr. and Val Kilmer.
► A Christmas Story - (1983) - "You'll shoot your eye out kid."
Probably no other movie captures what it's like to be a kid during Christmas, and wanting something for Christmas so bad and the wait, wonder, doubt and amazement when you actually get it. It also gets a great many aspects of the family dynamics perfectly, as well as those God-awful gifts that Aunts send. Directed by Bob Clark, who also wrote and directed Porky's (in fact, the "Leg Lamp" makes an appearance in one of the Porky's films), A Christmas Story captures those highs and lows of Christmas that seem so important, but with time become memories that make you laugh and cherish the experience.
I have spent Christmas Day with my Mother trying to find an open restaurant, so the Chinese Christmas Dinner is especially great.
From
Roger Ebert:
The movie is based on a nostalgic comic novel named 'In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash,' by Jean Shepherd, the radio humorist, who also narrates it. He remembers the obvious things, like fights with the bullies at school, and getting into impenetrable discussions with younger kids who do not quite know what all the words mean. He remembers legendary schoolteachers and hiding in the cupboard under the sink and having fantasies of defending the family home with a BB gun.
But he also remembers, warmly and with love, the foibles of parents. The Old Man in "A Christmas Story" is played by Darren McGavin as an enthusiast. Not an enthusiast of anything, just simply an enthusiast. When he wins a prize in a contest, and it turns out to be a table lamp in the shape of a female leg in a garter, he puts it in the window, because it is the most amazing lamp he has ever seen. Of course. I can understand that feeling. I can also understand the feeling of the mother (Melinda Dillon), who is mortified beyond words.
► A Charlie Brown Christmas - (1965) - "Charlie Brown, you're the only person I know that can take a wonderful season like Christmas and turn it into a problem."
Charlie Brown, patron saint of endless optimism in the face of bad luck, is tasked with finding the "perfect" Christmas tree for a play. Charlie Brown's blind love for a sad, little Christmas tree, and how it brings out what many feel to be the true meaning of Christmas in the other Peanuts characters, has made this film a staple of Christmas for almost a half century.
From Todd VanDerWerff at the A.V. Club:
I don’t believe in the Christmas story, but I still think it’s true.
Charles Schulz is right there with me. A secular humanist, especially later in his life, Schulz stuck a religious message into the climactic moment of A Charlie Brown Christmas because he wanted to remind the world that all of the hubbub of Christmas has sprung up around a holiday with a solemn religious meaning, according to his biographer, David Michaelis, in Schulz And Peanuts: A Biography. When Charlie Brown makes the plea, “Isn’t there anyone who knows what Christmas is all about?” it’s a literal plea, within the context of the story. It’s not that Charlie Brown doesn’t know (he’s in the process of directing a staged version of the Christmas story, for God’s sake), but he needs to be reminded, needs to be taken back to the roots, to a place where Christmas is about something with meaning, something other than noise and gifts and commercial pap, something about two scared kids and a baby on the way and a clear night when all things seem possible.
It’s the Linus speech that both makes Charlie Brown Christmas divisive—I’ve talked with non-Christian friends who can’t stand this special—and makes it so great. It’s a moment of honest, heartfelt emotion in a form—the televised Christmas special—that seems designed to beat all honesty out of anything that comes in contact with it. The story of how this thing got on the air over numerous network objections—to the jazz score by Vince Guaraldi, to the idea of having real kids do the voices of the Peanuts kids, to the Linus speech—has nearly become legend, but the combination of lack of time and Schulz’s clout within the pop culture of the mid-’60s led to the whole thing getting on air pretty much exactly as Schulz wanted it, weird little-kid voices and jazz riffs intact.
► National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation - (1989) - "Merry Christmas. Kiss my ass. Kiss his ass. Kiss your ass. Happy Hanukkah."
If the original Vacation film perfectly satirizes what it's like to be in a cross-country family trip, this film gets what it's like trying to make everything "perfect" for Christmas, while family and in-laws are coming in, and depending on that Christmas bonus to cover everything.
If there's an overriding theme to be found in the Vacation films, it's that striving for perfection isn't everything. In fact, it's a burden that's unobtainable in the movies, and ultimately leads to disaster when the characters push for it. Happiness only comes when we can live with the fact that the big events that we obsess over may not match up to the perfect scenario of it we have in our heads.
► Gremlins - (1984) - "Now I have another reason to hate Christmas."
Many consider this a horror movie, but I watched this as a very young child. And even then, I remember asking my parents "well, isn't it always after midnight no matter when you feed them?"
From Time Out:
In Hollywood, the forces of truth, justice, family and America have always battled with the viewing public’s unquenchable lust for mayhem. Few movies have walked that tightrope as skilfully or subversively as 1984’s ‘Gremlins’, in which director Joe Dante tries to have his Christmas cake and puke all over it too. The setting is Kingston Falls, a Capraesque-Spielbergian suburban haven (with just a hint of poverty, alcoholism and unemployment) into which comes Gizmo the mogwai, a button-cute, furry ET clone with a dark secret: under certain circumstances, he begins breeding toothy, green id-monsters.
The film’s craftiest trick is that we never know which side Dante is on: these demonic invaders may threaten everything the well-meaning, self-satisfied townsfolk hold dear, but is that such a bad thing? And don’t they look like they’re having one hell of a party? The result is a jangling, lunatic sugar rush of a movie, in love with everything it satirises and bursting at the seams with psychotic energy
► The Nightmare Before Christmas - (1993) - "T'was a long time ago, longer now than it seems, in a place that perhaps you've seen in your dreams."
Is this a Halloween movie or a Christmas movie? It's both, and tells the tale of how Jack Skellington, the Pumpkin King, has grown tired of Halloween. Jack wants to celebrate Christmas, and puts his own spin on the holiday. Things go wrong, and hilarity ensues.
Interestingly enough, Katie Schenkel recently had an piece over at The Mary Sue arguing the subtext of the film is cultural appropriation. Up until the end of the film, Jack takes bits and pieces of Christmas, but doesn't understand it or give any thought to its true meaning.
Despite what some news programs will tell you about us being in a post-racist world, examples of cultural appropriation in the new millennium pop up all the time, most often used for “creative expression.” From Gwen Stefani recently defending her Harajuku Girls stereotypes, to Pharell wearing a Native American headdress during an Elle shoot, to Katy Perry’s ongoing stereotyping of black people in her videos. It’s certainly not just celebrities that do this — every October we see pictures from Halloween parties of racist costumes pulling from gross stereotypes/cheap imitations of real traditions and wearing them for a joke. Then there’s that Washington football team, Urban Outfitters using fake Navajo designs on their clothes (including the “Navajo hipster panty”), this recent bit of bad taste from Ralph Lauren, and countless designer fashion shoots that, like the Elle shoot, have used Native American headdresses.
I think what I like best is that the message of the movie isn’t that you should avoid learning about cultures outside your own. No, the lesson is to see how Jack went about it the wrong way and realize how he could have done it better. If you’re going to learn about other people’s cultures and traditions, approach it from a place of respect. Go to the people who live that life and treat them as the experts. Listen to others if they say you’re stepping over your bounds. Show humility. Ask questions in a respectful way. Don’t try to “improve” cultural elements just because that’s easier than understanding it fully. Above all, practice empathy. And that’s a pretty good lesson for us at any age.
Happy holidays, everyone.
► Emmet Otter's Jug-Band Christmas - (1977) - "Oh, "There Ain't No Hole in the Washtub!" That's what you call your basic 'keeping-warm-while-you're-rowing-home' kinda song."
Muppets +
The Gift of Magi =
Epic Win.
Whatever its origins, there was a mania in the ’70s for the old-timey: turn-of-the-century motifs in theme restaurants and product-packaging; fashions influenced by the ’20s; low-budget crime movies set during the Depression; rock music with a “down home” flavor; and on and on and on.
Puppeteer Jim Henson was very much in step with those times, both in his callbacks to vaudeville on The Muppet Show and hisevocations of rural living in projects like the TV special Emmet Otter’s Jug-Band Christmas. Emmet Otter is especially artisanal in look and message. Based on a 1971 children’s book written by the late Russell Hoban (and illustrated by his then-wife Lillian), Emmet Otter follows the story of a poor-but-happy young otter and his widowed mother, who scratch out a living doing odd jobs up and down the close-knit river community of Frogtown Hollow. Henson’s workshop uncannily recreated the feel of Lillian Hoban’s drawings, crafting small, fuzzy figures all bundled in fabric... Longtime Muppet sympathizer Paul Williams wrote the songs for Emmet Otter, and much like his soundtrack for the Brian De Palma horror musical Phantom Of The Paradise, Williams’ Emmet Otter songs are such a skilled pastiche of eclectic styles that they sound like they’ve always existed. Whether Emmet and his Ma are laying down some foreshadowing by singing the hootenanny-ready “Ain’t No Hole In The Washtub" or Emmet and his buddies are extolling the virtues of jug band music in the peppy “Barbeque,” Williams’ music never sounds out of place.
► Scrooged - (1988) - "Well, I'm sure Charles Dickens would have wanted to see her nipples."
I could have chosen almost any of the films based on Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol, and there have been a lot of them. However, I'm a sucker for Bill Murray speeches in film. His speech in Stripes is my favorite, but the one Murray delivers in Scrooged is a close second. It was also mostly improvised by Murray.
► Miracle On 34th Street - (1947) - "Faith is believing when common sense tells you not to."
Santa Claus is real and he works at Macy's! The film is probably one of the first to offer the critique of the clash created by commercialism replacing the spiritual elements of Christmas, while also championing the controversial position that children (and by extension society as a whole) should be allowed to let their imaginations run wild.
This all happens after Macy's hires an old man named Kris Kringle (Edmund Gwenn) to be their Mall Santa. He charms the customers, and even the Macy's PR (Maureen O'Hara) manager who hired Kris and her little daughter Susan (Natalie Wood) into believing in Christmas again. But he also claims to be the real Santa Claus. Most people are content to let Kris believe this. However, Macy's psychologist disagrees and attempts to get Kris committed to a mental asylum. All of this leads to a trial, where the defense (John Payne) decides to argue that Kris is not insane because he really is Santa Claus.
"All right, you go back and tell them that the New York State Supreme Court rules there's no Santa Claus. It's all over the papers. The kids read it and they don't hang up their stockings. Now what happens to all the toys that are supposed to be in those stockings? Nobody buys them. The toy manufacturers are going to like that; so they have to lay off a lot of their employees, union employees. Now you got the CIO and the AF of L against you and they're going to adore you for it and they're going to say it with votes. Oh, and the department stores are going to love you too and the Christmas card makers and the candy companies. Ho ho. Henry, you're going to be an awful popular fella. And what about the Salvation Army? Why, they got a Santa Claus on every corner, and they're taking a fortune. But you go ahead Henry, you do it your way. You go on back in there and tell them that you rule there is no Santy Claus. Go on. But if you do, remember this: you can count on getting just two votes, your own and that district attorney's out there." -Charles Halloran
"The District Attorney's a Republican." -Judge Henry X. Harper