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[ominous political ad narrator]
Are the President's kids more important than yours?
Why are his kids protected by armed guards at school, while yours endure the tyranny of gun-free schools?
Why do they get to fly on planes and helicopters with anti-missile technology, while our kids . . . ride the bus.
Why do the President's kids get the best seat in the house, behind bulletproof glass, while our kids are exposed to . . . low levels of radiation?
Why are streets closed down as parades magically appear for these elitist hypocrites, while our kids . . . sit in traffic.
Why do the President's kids have a father with access to the most powerful army on earth, while our kids are forbidden from invading even one country.
And why does their dad have access to the most awesome arsenal known to man, yet our kids can't even be in the same house as nuclear launch codes?
Nuclear launch codes for their kids, and gun-free zones for ours.
NRA, Stand and Launch.