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Are you up to your ears in debt?
Do the bills just keep coming?
Get your financial house in order by refusing to pay!
"Debt-B-Gone" lets you take control of your financial future by not paying your bills of the past!
Sure, some might call it "defaulting," but Debt-B-Gone is really a fiscal responsibility tool developed by the accounting wizards at "Republi-Con, Incorporated."
Bought too much home entertainment on credit? Do the responsible thing and refuse to pay!
Car payments out of hand? Stop paying them to show you won't stand for your fiscal irresponsibility!
Ate a few too many lobsters with your steak? Just don't pay!
Remember, you're today's fiscal conservative!
[Wimpy: I'll gladly not pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today!]
And take charge of your future bar tabs by not paying for your previous seventeen beers!
You don't have a drinking problem, you have a debt problem!
Remember, fiscal responsibility starts with not paying for what you've bought!
Debt-B-Gone also means you'll get the "Bill-Me-Never-Boehner"-- the perfect way to handle those pesky calls from bill collectors!
[Bill Collector: Uh, you purchased fifty-eight Super Deluxe Flying Jet Fighter--
Boehner: Go fuck yourself! Go fuck yourself!]
Debt-B-Gone, by Republi-Con, Incorporated. When you absolutely, positively, have to blow up the economy to get your way.