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[Little Suzie Newsykins]
This Thanksgiving, I'm thankful for so many things!
First, I'm thankful that I know how to draw a turkey using just my hand!
Draw around your hand, then put a beak, feet and gobbly stuff on it-- there's your turkey!
Next, draw another hand, a head, add lotsa medals, then some peacock feathers . . .
. . . and you can be thankful for a great general who won two wars by, um, kinda' almost sorta ending them someday . . .
Thankfully, you can also draw around your hand, add the head, a mistress, a shirtless FBI agent and a little more hanky-panky, and . . .
Presto! Problems in Libya and massacres in Syria disappear far into the background!
Next, draw around your left hand, then your right.
Draw two heads, a dancing horse, and a billionaire obsessed with birth certificates--
and you can be thankful nobody even talked about global warming, um . . . until Manhattan flooded.
And I'm so thankful I can draw both hands a buncha' times, add lots and lotsa' heads, shopping bags, and money for Black Friday . . .
. . . and not even notice the fighting in Israel and Gaza! (Let alone Congo and Sudan.)
That's what I'm most thankful for-- the news that keeps our minds off the news!
Happy Thanksgiving! And keep those turkeys coming the end.